


Relative State of Discomfort

by alma3lm3r



Category: SHINee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-22
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-11-28 04:26:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18203507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alma3lm3r/pseuds/alma3lm3r
Summary: Taemin falls on his ass in a public bathroom and Jonghyun sees and laughs at him and Taemin cries.





	Relative State of Discomfort

**Author's Note:**

> tw for kind of anxious thoughts

Taemin has to keep his head down on the sidewalks, dodging misguided eyes. They never have bad intentions, but it's any intention, any curiosity at all that gets to him. Once he gets to work he raises his head to smile at his coworkers, thoughts passing by too quickly to keep up with. He helps set up for the morning, then slips on an apron and stands in front of the cash register, mentally preparing for hours of loud loud loud, customers speaking over each other and friends laughing and children yelling. A headache starts to pool in between his eyes as the first few people walk in.

He has to tuck his hair into the back of his shirt to look neater, but it itches and sticks to his skin, and he can feel it all day. He tries to stand still or shift it to the right place but he still feels it, his heart racing with every move. 

By the end of his shift, as usual, he's about to explode. He heads to the bathroom and pulls his hair out of his shirt, long blonde strands getting caught where he sweat from the heat and nerves. He wets a paper towel and tries to reach the middle of his back, desperate to get rid of any hair or sweat left behind. One hand reaches into the top of his shirt, the other through the bottom, but he can't seem to find what's irritating him. He lifts a leg and sets it on the sink, stretches back and reaches so he swipes across all of his back with the soaking paper towel, but it still doesn't go away. The door to the restroom creaks open and Taemin damns himself for using the public one because it was closer. 

Taemin stumbles back as someone enters the restroom, head down and humming to themselves quietly, soon cut off by the sound of Taemin banging his head against the bathroom stall, falling onto his ass with one hand still down the back of his shirt.

The man stops and stands completely still, his eyes caught on Taemin’s. He has light brown hair falling into them, and looks about Taemin’s age. Too small to be intimidating but he seems confident, which is scary. The door swings shut behind him. Taemin slowly pulls his hand out of his shirt and drops the wet paper towel on the ground, wincing at the pain in his head. He doesn’t say anything and waits for the awkward “are you okay”s before he gets up, frozen in place from staring this guy in the eyes. He stands there for a bit longer silently, mouth open and hands held in the air, and then . . . bursts into laughter. Loud and boisterous, echoing off the walls. He bends over and grabs his knees and Taemin feels more petrified than ever, like a cold egg was just cracked over his head and all he can do is sit still. It’s way past the end of his shift and he shouldn't even be here right now, he should be at home under the covers on his couch, petting his cat, watching a movie. The past few hours of irritation have built up in his chest and had him standing on the edge of a cliff, and this just tips him way over the edge. He feels tears start to spill out before he even realizes he might cry, and by then it’s too late.

Eventually the man’s laughs devolve into giggles and he leans back and wipes his eyes, before looking down at Taemin again and freezing. Taemin watches the panic on his face for a second but his vision gets too blurry and he drops his head, hiding in his hands and crying out all the tension.

“I’m- I’m so sorry- I wasn't- I- are you okay?” he trips over his words but Taemin can barely hear him anyways, his voice drowned out by his own quiet sobs amplified in his head. 

He stumbles over and crouches next to Taemin, not quite touching him but hovering his hands over his shoulders and head, trying to find a way to help. 

“Did you hit your head that hard? Do I need to call someone? Oh my god-”

Taemin manages to choke a few words out.

“I'm sorry, it’s just- I work here and- this is so embarrassing.”

“You're not hurt? Are you sure? Do you have a concussion? How many fingers am I holding up?”

He moves in front of Taemin and shoves his hand into his face, thumb pointer and middle fingers sticking straight up. His panicking only makes Taemin feel worse, his chest tightening and he lets out another loud sob. He doesn't even try to stop crying, instead letting the tears come out in rivers, enough to fill up the room and send them floating out. Bobbing in the waves, salt spraying up against his skin.

Taemin can’t bring himself to look up and see the man trying to help again, his head hanging low from the exhaustion of the day catching up. He hears a soft sigh after a couple minutes of nothing but his own choked breathing and quiet sobs, and sees a shadow move from his half open eyes behind his hands to settle at his side. Luckily the man doesn’t touch him, and once Taemin has stopped shaking so hard and calmed a bit he speaks up again. 

“Do you . . . want to talk about?” 

His voice is gentle. If the room were full of discarded petals, hanging from the ceiling and resting against the floor, his words wouldn’t disturb any. Just lightly flow over and maybe add some color, intentionally letting everything keep its place. 

Taemin turns his face, sticky and hot, away from his hands to look at him. His first instinct is, no, absolutely not.  _ He probably made his order already and was just taking a bathroom break before eating or he could’ve eaten already and should be on his way home right now, to a significant other or to a business meeting or out to meet friends - he hasn't even gone to the bathroom yet! _ \- but when he meets his eyes Taemin’s worries float to a corner of his mind, at least for a little bit. His posture is relaxed, his eyes understanding and wide, and he seems to genuinely care. Taemin keeps his knees pulled up to his chest and his back hunched, curled in as much as he can, but he opens his mouth to speak. 

“There’s- there’s nothing really to talk about. I just,” Taemin words tumble out before he has time to think, “I just had a really hard day because the first woman who came in has come in every day for the past two weeks and today she wouldn’t tell me her order because she wanted me to remember, but I couldn’t remember, how am I supposed to remember that? I don’t even remember her name? Which I realize I should but I’m really bad at things like that, I try I just can’t get it, and then the coffee machine overflowed and everyone else was taking a lunch break so I had to deal with that while dealing with a line of customers stopped up by a couple who brought in five kids and none of them knew what they wanted, but all of this was okay and I was just gonna go home but the store policy says I have to hide my hair so I stuff it in my shirt everyday and I sweat when I get nervous so the hair just gets tangled and sticks everywhere and even after I pull my hair out some strands get left behind so I came in here to wipe off my back with a paper towel but I couldn’t reach it and then  _ you _ had to come in here and scare me so I fell and hurt my ass and then you  _ laughed  _ about it like it was funny!”

The man looks mortified, eyes widened and jaw dropped and for a second Taemin feels bad for trying to blame him.

“I’m so sorry,” he pauses like he wants to say more but nothing comes out. 

“It-it’s okay.” Taemin turns away from him and looks down at his hands in his lap, suddenly feeling more embarrassed than ever. “It’s not really your fault.”

“I know but . . . I made it worse, didn’t I?”

Taemin looks back up. He looks earnest, really asking for the truth. So Taemin gives him a small nod and scrunches his eyebrows together when he sees a small smile forming on the man’s rosy lips. 

“I’m sorry,” he says again, a lighter tone to his voice this time, before glancing down at Taemin’s shirt, “Taemin.”

Taemin feels his cheeks heat up before he can even process what’s going on. “It’s fine, really, it’s okay now.”

He looks at the man and his side-swept bangs and tiny black studs, soft smile and fitted t-shirt. 

“What’s your name?”

He smiles so wide it makes stars burst behind Taemin’s eyes. 

“Jonghyun. Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to . . . meet you too.” Taemin suddenly realizes everything that’s happened in the last fifteen minutes and feels his heart start to speed up again. He groans in embarrassment and drops his head into his hands. 

“I’m sorry, this is so embarrassing.”

Jonghyun laughs a little, but this time Taemin’s laughing too. 

“That’s okay! It’s just a more interesting way than usual to meet a person. I’m glad I chose to go to the bathroom before I left.”

“Oh do you need to use the restroom? I can - I was on my way out anyways-“ Taemin stands and dusts off his thighs but the man stays seated. 

“No, I uh . . . I just wanted to look in the mirror to be honest.”

Taemin stares at him and then laughs hard, letting more of the tension he managed to hang onto go, smile growing wide and showing his teeth. Jonghyun laughs with him and then stands up. 

“But if you were on your way out, if you don’t have anything else to do, I’d love to go get some . . . ice cream or coffee or something . . .” He says ice cream or coffee like they’re an afterthought, second to the part where Taemin may be joining him.

Taemin feels a little shaky and tired but lets his instincts carry him before his thoughts for once. 

“I’d love that. Yeah. That would be nice right now. Or maybe just some tea. I know a couple good places, or you could show me somewhere, it doesn’t matter.”

Jonghyun laughs again, high and airy and it makes something flutter in Taemin’s chest. 

“Okay, we can figure out somewhere on the way.”

Taemin’s smile shakes a little but he takes a deep breath and throws out the paper towel he’s been holding onto this whole time.

“Okay.”

 


End file.
